monkey wrestles ghost

Spectacular

This past Saturday was International Pillow Fight Day and thousands of revelers gathered in Union Squareto mark the occasion. I was on hand to take pictures and get whomped dozens of times while trying. Eventually I took up arms myself, and had a blast. The event evoked the carefree joy of children playing in a broken fire hydrant, and the release that comes from uncontrollable infectious laughter. Sure, it was also a spectacle, but what else do you expect from New York these days? This is where we gather to share spectacles.

Speaking of spectacles, last month I experienced the thrill of attending KAIJU BIG BATTEL, which bills itself as “the world's only live, monster fighting spectacle”. KAIJU BIG BATTEL (I think it should always be shouted) is pro-wrestling performed in elaborate Japanese monster costumes. That in and of itself makes KAIJU BIG BATTEL worth attending.

But where traditional pro wrestling manipulates its fans through storylines and characters based on a putrid (and fascinating) mix of sex, race, and violence, KAIJU BIG BATTEL turns that formula on its head with arbitrarily fantastical teams like "Team Space Bug”, and patently absurd characters like Kung-Fu Chicken Noodle (the “unfriendliest rogue consomme”), and a giant radioactive sea urchin named Unibuzo, whose origins are described as follows:

Unibouzu once is the geek boy. Snort when laugh and no friend or lady in school. Lucky for dork, atomic urchin biting and grow strong. In not the luck for boy, getting the most stupid too.

With such delightfully absurd elements, the audience can cheer, boo, and otherwise engage their fandom in total freedom. When was the last time you could root for something just because you wanted to, and for no other reason? This is the genius of KAIJU BIG BATTEL.

Enough. Good clean fun shouldn’t be subjected to such analysis.  Pics here (I think you'll be able to figure out which are the Kaiju pics).

Now Hear This

I made and therefore ate too much pasta last night. If I were a pet, my owner would think I was an endearing idiot. I often eat too much and upset my stomach. I have a favorite toy (my bike), and want to play with it as if heedless of the time of day. I like to sleep a lot, especially in sunbeams, and startle easily. Put me in an alpine meadow and I frolic. I’m fascinated by what the other pets are doing.

 

But if I could speak to my owner, I might say, “I want to believe in a God, and that makes me less of an animal than if I actually did.” But that would make me a talking animal, and any grown-up knows those aren’t real. When I realized that, it made me appreciate the Chuck Jones all the more. And before you judge this post absurd, consider viewing Jones’ “Now Hear This”, which tells (a story?) of a man who uses the devil’s missing horn as a hearing aid. When one thing leads to another, it all makes sense, even if it doesn’t.

Moral:  Going to bed over-gorged with bolognese sauce makes you dream of a romance in lower mathematics .

Everyone needs superheroes, even Canadians

You just have to click here to realize that Christopher Nolan gets it.  Batman is serious s___, not some sort of whimsical fantasyland where Danny DeVito shuffles about in makeup and a fat suit, or where this constitutes a diabolical plot:

Mr. Freeze: I will blanket the city in endless winter. First Gotham, and then the world.

Poison Ivy: Just what I had in mind. Everything dead on earth, except us. A chance for Mother Nature to start again. Behold, the dawn of a new age. My mutant plants have the strength of the deadliest animals. Once you have frozen mankind, these babies will overrun the globe, and we shall rule them, for we will be the only two people left in the world.

Mr. Freeze: And then I'll be elected Governor of California!

Ok, so I made up that last bit. But seriously, isn’t the part that I “made up” more diabolically terrifying than their actual plot?

I desperately cling to Nolan’s work on Batman as Hollywood pillages my youth. A few weeks ago I went to see “The Shadow Chronicles”, a shameless and atrocious attempt to revive and exploit the Robotech franchise, which taught me everything I ever needed to learn about love triangles (Lisa Hayes rocks, Minmei is a cheap slut, if you must know where I stood at the time). Earlier this year, Michael Bay transformed the lovable Transformers cartoon into a militaristic and jingoistic extension of his days as a Mastercard commercial director. (Pointless crappy movie? $150 million. Sullying the childhood memories of a generation of youth while sporting a mullet? Priceless.)

I thought the pillaging had reached its nadir last year, when I saw the first trailer for Ghost Rider. I don’t think he’d drag me to hell for observing that he’s not exactly tier-one superhero talent. But I've since learned that we can look forward to movies based on Cloak and Dagger (I actually kind of liked that series, but I’m pretty sure no one else did) and Namor the Sub-Mariner.

Namor the Sub-Mariner??? I think we all understand and accept that superheroes need to wear tights, but shouldn’t we draw the line at a superhero who wears a Speedo?  At this rate, it won't be long before I'm enjoying the Alpha Flight movie. 

Yeah, that was a gratuitous cheap shot at Canada.  I'm not proud of it.

Fw: Check this out

I still haven't found a place in NY yet, but I did get high-speed internet installed at the place I'm staying.  It's said that when you live in New York, the whole city is your living room.  If so, does a broadband connection make the entire internet your backyard?

To commemorate my reconnectedness, I thought I'd share some YouTube videos that have captivated me lately.  It's the blog version of those eventually annoying emails you got in the late '90s from your friends pointing you to one site or another.

Starting with this music video featuring a preternaturally cute robot named Keepon (as well as the city of Tokyo).  Be sure to stick around for the robot jam session at the end.  Keepon has cameras in its eyes and a mic in its nose, so it reacts directly to its environment.  It was developed to interact with children, and is used for academic research.  If you're wondering, like I did, where you get one, Keepon is not commercially available.  For more Keepon videos click here, here, and here.

I've also compulsively watched and replayed this video of a bike messenger race through Manhattan.  Whether you think it's a display of extraordinary skill, recklessness, or stupidity, the entire video is nuts.  They don't stop for red lights, and weave their way through densely packed traffic at high speed.  There's a particularly harrowing traffic weave from 3:15 to 3:30.  I can't wait to buy a bike and start riding around the city, especially late at night when traffic subsides and I imagine it's just me, my bike, and the city.

This video from the new TV comedy "Flight of the Conchords" has been cracking me up for weeks.  It's a love ballad to the most beautiful girl on the street, "depending on the street", who is beautiful "like a tree" and could be a "part-time model", though she'd "probably have to keep her normal job".  For more info on these Kiwis, click here.

Finally (whew), I've created a map of my time in New York, which consists mostly of quick restaurant impressions, but also a few other locations of note.  If you have any suggestions for places to eat or things I should check out in NY, please let me know.